Looking After Your Mental Health During The Coronavirus Pandemic

There are so many people in the world who are trying to “make it”, trying to earn the big bucks, achieve greatness and ultimately succeed at life as if it were some type of linear platform game with one outcome. But what if there were another way to achieve greatness? What if to become truly happy with your life you didn’t need a lot of money, a high powered job role, or fancy material possessions?

You’d probably tell me that I’m simply spouting hippie, holistic mambo jumbo, and ask when the pyramid scheme was going to crop up. But I’m not here selling a new job that you can do from home, nor am I offering anything other than a bit of advice on creating that perfect work/life balance so that you make time for you.

In today’s climate, a lot of people have been put in those unusual positions where they are either jobless, furloughed, or working from home and its taking some getting used to.

At the beginning of the year I found myself jobless, crying over finances because universal credit wasn’t enough to cover my rent, let alone the loan I’d taken out a while back when I thought I had job security, it was a piss poor service and I was at risk of becoming homeless.

I was utterly despondent, and I know there are others out there in a similar boat, stuck in the middle of an ocean without a paddle to direct themselves.

I setup alerts for jobs and readjusted my finances, squeezing every last penny and making them work for me. There were options, and if you check out the money man Martin Lewis then there are sure to be some guides to help you.

However comfortable I made my financial situation, I was still battling with another concern: that I was taking a massive step backwards in my career progression. That somehow I was less of a person because I had stopped that forward motion.

Shortly after, I found myself with a lot of time on my hands. I started to take care of myself, started exercising everyday, eating well and taking the time to really look after my skin. I even meditated and started reading again which is something I’d never thought I’d have time to do.

I started to feel happier in myself, started to feel more confident in my body. I’d spent so many years worrying about what my legs looked like and never getting them out until this year when I decided to revamp my wardrobe and started to wear dresses without tights. I thought “fuck it” I’d lost everything else this year, what did it matter if I got my legs out? I finally got them tanned and suddenly I was happy with the way my body looked.

So even though I had no title to my name or money to buy material possessions, I felt more in tune with myself than I’d ever felt before. It was almost like I’d reset myself.

They say that time is the best healer during breakups but it also works with breaks from your career. You really get the time to spend doing the things that you want or have wanted to do for a long time.

They’ll come a day where you can kick-start your career again, grow your finances and live in a materialistic world once more but take this rare opportunity for a break when you can and really try to change that negative perspective into a positive one.

As I’ve said in this blog a thousand times before, and I’ll probably say it a thousand times more, life is an adventure, treat it like one, take the ups with the downs as when it’s all over, you’ll have one hell of a story to tell.


Kirsty Allen is a tech savvy, marketing professional with an eye for design. With motivational copy like this blog post, she has managed to grow her community across the globe, reaching thousands of hearts.

To see how she can help your business to grow, get in contact today at roamblogger@gmail.com or by phone on 07857358767.

Services include: Branding for business, Marketing strategies and implementation, Product listing for your business industry, as well as Ecommerce Optimisation.

Dancing My Way To Happiness: Salsa Edition

I’m attempting the ‘yes lifestyle’. It’s where I say yes as often as I can to new and exciting experiences where before I would have said no out of fear.

So, as a bid to get me out of the flat for an evening and socialise with new people, each Tuesday the Mansion Lions Hotel in Eastbourne hosts salsa dancing lessons to complete beginners right up to those who are more advanced (doing spins and shit).

It was an opportunity which arose when my friend Ruth offered up the evening one afternoon while I was feeling crappy and I took a leap of faith and agreed to give it a go. What was I going to lose? An evening alone at home again? Good.

I’m not going to lie and say that the initial walk down to the hotel wasn’t rife with um’s and err maybe I should turn around’s but I pursued and did the one thing that day that scared me shitless.

And I can safely say, I am so proud of myself for going. I can say I’ve learnt the basic steps and would be able, since I’m the woman and can be led in the dance, to take my new found steps into a salsa club which opens up so many new and exciting ventures for the future.

It’s a shame I didn’t have a partner to go with as it’s something that would really suit a couple, however, it didn’t matter. Since you’re constantly swapping and changing partners in the class anyway I was able to go as a solo dancer.

It was an incredibly fun evening and it was one of the first days in the week where I’ve actually felt truly comfortable in my own skin which is something I haven’t been able to say in a long time. I feel like I’m beginning to come to terms with what it means to be me and how I am outside of a relationship and surprisingly, I’m getting on quite well with her.

I’m beginning to see what they mean when they say you need to love yourself before you can love anyone else because although I have felt love before, it’s always been shadowed with this concern that I am somehow not good enough but I’m starting to think that single life has changed that outlook.

So I never thought I’d say this but thank you to my ex. You were the catalyst which forced me into a situation I needed to be in but wouldn’t necessarily put myself in. I’m learning who I am and it wouldn’t have happened without you.

So yes, ultimately heartbreak led me here but I feel like I’m slowly but surely putting the pieces of myself back together, only this time in a different order. Maybe this time the puzzle pieces will align in the right places.

And who knows what the future will hold. There may be the opportunity to love again, but only when I am truly comfortable with myself.

Until next time.

P.s for those of you who fancy it, why not join me at salsa this Tuesday 7.30pm at Mansion Lions Hotel, Eastbourne?

Managing Your Life: Dealing With The Unexpected

I seem to do my best writing on a Sunday morning. While my partner sleeps, I write, his calming presence accompanied by the early morning bird song really gives me a chance to breathe, and access my creativity.

Sometimes we find ourselves in situations we can’t control, or are unexpected. This weekend I had a nasty surprise, a lady who I had thought was my friend who had betrayed my trust, popped back up unexpectedly and the encounter wasn’t pleasant.

This encounter knocked me for six and I needed a moment to compose myself but obviously, seeing as I’m still writing about it, it has been playing on my mind.

There’s something very Freudian about thinking about the people that don’t like you. I suppose it’s a self reflection and retrospective view into my psyche and how I strive to be liked by most people I meet but that’s an impossibility and I know that. So why did it affect me so much that this one person so obviously didn’t care about me any more?

I’m hoping that by expressing my thoughts I can put this whole experience behind me and develop into a much stronger and less dependent individual.

Looking at the situations that have led to this circumstance which I’m in today, I can see that the main reason it hit me so much with my ex friend was because I currently have a distinct lack in female friends and although there is nothing inherently wrong with having male friends (in fact sometimes it can be a breath of fresh air) I realised that I missed the shopping trips, the girly days out, and the movie nights.

So it wasn’t that I missed the friend, it was more that I was missing the emotional connection that only girls hanging with girls seem to provide.

So obviously, my female friendships need working on in order to make me feel like a well rounded individual again but in knowing this, I feel like a weight has lifted. I don’t feel as awful from my terrible encounter as I know why and how I can move past it which is a trick I think applies across all aspects of life.

Whether we bump into people that are now strangers, or run into situations that frustrate us, it’s important to self assess why we feel the way we do, looking deep within ourselves to the ugly parts of our psyche. In doing so, and discovering the parts of us which we don’t like, we can then actively pursue life paths which point us in a direction which ultimately leads to true happiness.

Until next time.